Wednesday, June 3, 2009

So incase you've missed it, here's an update of my health...

So last month I hadn’t been to the doctor in years, now I’ve got 4 doctors. I have a team of doctors just waiting to poke and prick and probe my every orifice.

SO, the Doc and I talked for about a hour and she felt around a bit on me and she’s come to some conclusions.

1. I’m now on Zoloft. Okay, I sort of expected this, we’ll see how I do.

2. I either have a bleeding ulcer or a GI bleed… which is kinda sorta serious.

3. I get to sample my own stool!

4. I get to partake in a colonoscopy, whilst under general anesthesia, which is scary.

Here are some PRO TIPS for everyone, feel free to pass along all this sageness to your friends.

1. Don’t take 12-15(sometimes I took more) excedrine for pain for 5 or 6 years. This will fuck up your stomach.

2. Don’t take 12-15 excedrine for pain for 5 or 6 years while being an alcoholic. This will fuck your stomach up.

3. Anxiety and smoking with caffine in addition to the previously mentioned PRO TIPS will fuck up your stomach.

Oh yeah, I also get to get full blood work done so that they can see what else is wrong with me besides the obvious.

Sooooo the rest of this day will be spent drinking caffine free rootbeer and watching A&E until Sunshine comes to visit me late tonight.

Should I get a Clean and Sober tattoo?